


Everything Illuminated

by alias2335



Category: Code Geass
Genre: Developing Relationship, Drama & Romance, F/M, Friendship, Mild Sexual Content, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Road Trips, Tsundere Kallen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22120684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alias2335/pseuds/alias2335
Summary: Kallen is maybe, possibly, falling for Gino. A little bit.Only, she's realized this only after learning that maybe Gino is hung up on his ex who he has only recently found after years.So logically, she's going to accompany him on a trip to see what has become of this woman of the past.
Relationships: Kouzuki Kallen/Gino Weinberg, Villetta Nu/Ougi Kaname
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

After the war ended, school had been a mixture of fun moments and boring lapses for Kallen.

She was finishing school for two reasons, mainly. She wanted to feel like a normal teenager- at least, to have the chance to be one after everything that had happened… and also because she wanted to postpone her reintegration into the Black Knights and to the military career that awaited her. She wanted, more than anything, to take the time to have fun with her friends, both old and new… knowing as she did that it wouldn’t last. 

Rivalz was the only one still present from the original student council, but Milly visited often enough that her absence wasn’t really felt… and Anya, too, made time to stop by, every now and then. 

Today felt different from all those other days, and it was because of Gino Weinberg. 

Gino had been acting strange, unlike himself since first period. Looking blankly at walls and muttering to himself, frequently staring at his phone screen without actually texting anything before putting it back in his pocket. 

Kallen felt intensely, and uncomfortably, aware of his mood. Their usual banter during history was absent, his loud voice and laughter subdued and inexistent. He had even decided not to join her during lunch, a deviation from their usual routine, and was entirely absent from math class. 

In the afternoon, the time when all the respective clubs got together, including the student council, Kallen decided to discard her books and homework to instead stare discreetly at the tall blonde out of the corner of her eye, trying to decide how to breach a conversation. 

Usually, it was the easiest thing in the world. Gino was a master of small talk… he needed no prompting to start a conversation. 

_Usually._

And they did talk a lot every day. About Knightmares - both the Gurren MK II and the Tristan had been destroyed in the final battle against Leulouch, but both pilots had gotten replacement Knightmares after the fact. At first Akatsuki frames, but Kallen had upgraded to a Gloucester similar to Cornelia’s and Gino to a Vincent, not long after the debree of the war had settled and things went back to normal. Or rather, the new normal. 

They talked about Britannia sometimes, and about Japan, and about the politics and the government and all their shared acquaintances in both. 

Gino, who on occasion could also be a huge flirt, would also get into frequent arguments with Kallen. In the privacy of her mind, she sometimes wondered why it bothered her so much. When he flirted with her, it flustered her, and when he flirted with others, she got annoyed. 

That thought takes her mind, unexpectedly, to Shirley. Shirley, unlike Kallen, had always been straight up. She liked to ask about feelings and after awkward conversations, the air was cleared, and no one ( _Kallen_ ) was left to stew in silence. 

She felt a pang of regret and nostalgia at the thought of the orange haired girl… like so many, gone too soon. 

But the image of Shirley motivated Kallen to speak up and break the uncomfortable silence in which she was currently part of, at last. 

“Oi. Gino. Why’re you down?” she asked.

He jerked a little in his seat and looked at her wide eyed, then his shoulders slumped and he groaned. 

“Obvious is it?” he said, peeved. 

Kallen smiled a little and replied, 

“To me it is. If it’s something about the war or something you have to deal with alone I get it I just… get the feeling it’s something different.”

He smiled at her, a hint of amusement in his blue eyes.

“So perceptive” He murmured. Then he sighed, running a hand through his hair and looking out the window in the same movement. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” asked Kallen impulsively, and Gino stayed silent for a while, his gaze fixed on some distant point outside, before seeming to shake himself out of his thoughts and turning to lock eyes with her. 

He had an intensity in his eyes that always startled her. A flicker of some deep emotion, hidden behind his light demeanor. It jolted her, as it always did, making her, almost unconsciously, sit a little straighter. 

Then he smiled at her, nodding, and says, “Actually, that might help.”

The story he told her was not, at all, what Kallen was expecting. 

It began like this: 

“I’ve told you before, but my life as a noble was rather… _sheltered_ , before I joined the military. I was homeschooled, I didn’t know anyone my parents didn’t want me to meet, I felt bored with life and had little to no consideration for anyone other than myself. In other words, you’re Typical Britannian Noble. The type you, Kallen really, really hate.”

_(His face as he said this had an odd smile on it, and Kallen felt like shrinking in her seat and telling him that she’d been wrong, that she understood, now, that not all Britanninans where assholes, just as she understood that not all Japanese were saints.)_

“This was what? 4 years ago? A little more? In any case one of the maids in the house got pregnant and my father laid her off. Kind of a douche move on his part, I know ow, but at the time… I just didn’t think of the maids as the same as us. They were just numbers, invisible people who did all that tedious stuff like cooking, cleaning, organizing in the house. The new maid was an 11.”

_(He didn’t say anything for a moment, and she had the urge to reassure him… This was a story about the old Gino. Not who he was today. A boy she had never met, a person she couldn’t judge him by… but she didn’t, and it didn’t matter, because he continued talking just the same.)_

“Her name was Iseo, she was 18, and unlike the other maids, friendly, not deferential. She quickly became my best friend, and not long after that I fell in love with her. She took me out of the house and to the city where she and her friends lived, once or twice, and helped me sneak into bars and parties despite being only 15, at the time. But the most important thing is that she showed me that there was more to an 11 than just being a number... and more to being a person than what I had been taught. I think it took her a while to see me as something other than the snobby kid she carried around into the underworld of Pendragon, but I think eventually she fell for me too.”

“In a lot of ways, Iseo was my first. First love, first kiss, first time I disobeyed my parents, got drunk, high, had sex, went partying… it was incredible. While it lasted at least. One day, another maid saw me kissing her and told my mother. They fired Iseo, obviously, threw her out without another word and locked me up in the house until she was gone. I got into a lot of fights with my parents after that, and after I was left out I looked for her everywhere... but I never found her. I ran away a year later when I just couldn’t take it anymore.”

“After that, I joined the military. I rose pretty fast in the ranks, and eventually became a Knight of the Rounds. Luciano used to say that I got into the Rounds because of my family, but the truth is, it was more despite them. They knew I was there, after I became a pilot and was no longer a no name private… but I think they preferred me there, not embarrassing them. I’ll never know for sure, because I hadn’t spoken to my parents ever since I ran away, and after F.L.E.I.J.A. hit Pendragon they died, so that reconciliatory conversation will never happen.”

He stopped again, looking at his hands, a profound sadness in his eyes. 

Kallen felt, that on some level, she might understand.

Her father had also been in the capital when the F.L.E.I.J.A. hit. They’d never gotten along, but sometimes she wondered about the man who had come to Japan before the invasion, who had fallen in love with a Japanese woman with a toddler son, and then after had been forced to marry another noble, for appearances sake. 

She’d never gotten to ask him what he thought of her decision to be Japanese, not Britannian. To be a soldier, not a noble… 

but like Gino said, the conversation would never happen. 

Gino took a deep breath, and continued talking. 

“Anya has been my closest friend since I entered the Rounds, and I told her all about Iseo at some point, though her memory being what it was in those days, she didn’t remember afterwards… she’s been living with Jeremiah Gottwald in the country, I’m not sure if you know?… yeah? oh, well, she told me about the Geass placed on her, and now she’d been slowly regaining her memories, about everything. And… well, Sayako-san must have helped her, but yesterday Anya wrote me a text telling me she's found Iseo, here in Japan. At least she's pretty sure it's my Iseo. Apparently she lives in Sendai now, she has a kid… Anya says I should probably go visit her, make sure she’s okay. She sent me the address this morning.”

And then he stopped. Quiet, once more. 

Kallen stayed quiet as well. She wasn’t sure what to say, though she knew she wanted to say something. 

She looked down at her hands, folded on her lap over her Ashford academy skirt. Her Gurren key, the necklace she wore daily as a reminder to herself and to the world at large of who she was, what she was capable of, what she’d done and all she had sacrificed for this new era seemed to mock her by saying _you’re useless with this sort of thing. Anyone else would know what to say._

In the past, Gino had pulled her out of a Lelouch-induced funk once or twice, and she’d confided in him snippets of her past… But somehow, this story… it felt heavier.

Personal… and intimate, even. 

“What are you going to do?” She asked eventually.

Gino crossed his arms in front of him, looking up to the ceiling. Quietly, he murmured, “I don’t know.”

“Do you still love her?” she asked. 

Her voice remained quietly controlled, as did her face… but Kallen could feel a strange pressure in her chest as she waited for him to answer... 

Gino looked at her, then towards his phone. The screen was dark, but now they both knew what it hid.

“I don’t know that, either.” he said, even quieter than before. 

That was the moment Rivalz decided to enter, loudly interrupting any further conversation.

And the day continued on. 

Kallen sent Gino constant furtive glances, but the moment had passed, and she knew the conversation would have to be left at that. 

Or so she'd thought.

“Gurren! Hey, wait a second!” He called out to her, as she walked home.

She stopped at the nickname, turning to see him run up to her, smiling brilliantly as was his tendency. She met his cerulean eyes straight on, for a second, then darted her vision a little to the right, focusing on his ear instead, face a little pink.

She noticed him shifting nervously, shouldering his bag and looking uneasy. But fearless as always, he forged on.

“Thanks for listening, this afternoon. It helped me clear my head a little. Do you think… um, wow, this is kind of hard to say…”

Kallen carefully looked back at his face, and to her astonishment, found him blushing, looking up at the sky. 

“Say I do decide to go? Do you think you could go with me? I mean, to see her? I know it’s a lot to ask but I really don’t think I can go there alone… I could ask Anya if you say no, so, I mean, no pressure-“

Quite unconsciously, Kallen felt her face brake out into a grin. She laid her hand on his arm, stopping his rambling mid sentence. 

Her stomach fluttered a little, but she ignored it. Probably just hunger. 

“Of course!” she said, “Tell me when, I’ll definitely go with you.”

Gino’s smile was radiant. 

He hugged her, a quick movement and suddenly he was all around her, murmuring “Thanks, Kallen” into her ear.

Before she could even react he’d pulled away and with a wave, left. 

She stood, frozen, blushing, watching his back until he rounded the corner and out of view, feeling a little worried, a little happy. 

Then she frowned.

Gino had been making her feel strange, lately. And she wasn’t sure if she disliked it. 


	2. Chapter 2

Together, they planned the trip. During lunch breaks, student council meetings, history class - 

_(As seniors, they’d been covering current history. As in, the politics and timeline of the Black Rebellion, and the war against the Demon Emperor. When they’d began the module, Kallen had stared at the professor in unconcealed disbelief… he droned on and on and on and on! about dates and specifics, and it all seemed so irrelevant, all things considered…_

_She’d turned to Gino, who sat to her left in that class, intent on conveying her mood… and found him asleep. Eyebrow twitching, she’d kicked him. Gino’s eyes had snapped open, and he’d stared momentarily at the teacher before looking at her._

_“Why’d you wake me?” he’d whispered._

_She blushed, suddenly embarrassed. “What if he turns around and finds you asleep?” she’d asked._

_But Gino just grinned._

_“Gurren, baby…((she blushed harder. She liked the nickname, Gurren, though she’d never tell him))…we lived the war, they’re going to write about us personally in the history books… If he wakes me, I’ll ask him if he knows what color Monica’s favorite lingerie was.”_

_He’d winked, and dropped his head again, closing his eyes._

_Ever since, History had been like an extra recess to them both._

_The teacher had, at times, looked at them both disapprovingly for not paying attention. But Gino was right. There was nothing he could say, really.)_

Though terrified of the actual confrontation with his first love, both Gino and Kallen found, to their surprise, that planning the trip was quite fun.

Gino would say that they should rent a car and go driving, take the chance to see the countryside and be tourists for a bit. Kallen convinced him it would be a bad idea. They’d have to consider the money they'd have to spend on gas… and it was too long of a drive, they could get lost… but most importantly, neither of them where very good at following traffic laws, as a result of the high speeds and maneuvers they did on a regular basis with Knightmare Frames. It would be, frankly, embarrassing to go to jail for _speeding_. 

She recommended taking the JR east train instead, and sure, it would still take them half a day to get there, but at least if they got tired and fell asleep, there would be no accidents. 

Plus, because of their influence as heroes of the new world they had a reasonably good chance of getting free tickets. Which meant extra money for nicer accommodations.

The UN paid, but the salaries where no where near what the Britannian Empire had payed the Knights of the Rounds. So Gino, at least, worried more about money now than he ever had in his life. Kallen’s got paid as well… even though she hadn’t officially re-entered the army. Ohgi said that those where trivialities. She was taking a sabbatical, not retiring forever, so every month she’d get a check. But those she used to maintain her mother, and their new life. Neither was swimming in money, heroes of the new world or not. 

That didn’t mean that they wouldn’t be doing some sightseeing. Neither had ever been to Sendai, and the internet revealed that the city was renowned for their natural hot springs, and with that agreed on, they found a medium priced hotel near one. 

Iseo’s house was not within comfortable walking distance, but there was good public transportation in the city, so that was not really a major problem. They then decided to leave on a Thursday afternoon, arrive at night, skip class on Friday and stay the weekend. They booked the hotel for 3 days and 3 nights and it was all settled for them to go in a week’s time.

Gino lived alone, so he had no trouble, but Kallen got into a huge fight with both her mother and Ohgi about it. 

Both said: it's dangerous and irresponsible, to which she replied with a snort and a look, reminding them that she was the Black Knight’s Ace Pilot and could therefore take care of herself. And really, missing one day of class was hardly that bad.

But it wasn't not her security they were worried about so much as an objection that she shouldn’t be going alone to a place so far with only Gino Weinberg for company. Considering he was, after all, _a boy._

The implication made Kallen blush, her stomach clenching annoyingly, again. But she told them both to shut up, it wasn't like that, she was doing a favor for _a friend,_ so could they please leave it at that?

She did get their permission, _barely_ , though she assured Gino through a text that she would have gone with or without it. He texted back that he was glad she’d got it. Really, really glad.

Villetta didn't tell her to be careful, instead, completely unprompted, began talking about her time as Chigusa, and how she began falling in love with Ohgi during those quiet times, when they where all alone. She said that feelings tended to strengthen on trips like the one Kallen was about to undertake. And, Villeta said, even though she, Kallen, was an incredible soldier… sometimes danger appeared in the most unexpected ways. 

Unlike Ohgi and her mother, Kallen found herself more receptive to the advice given to her by the amber eyed woman. 

Because truthfully, she was a _tiny_ bit nervous about the trip.

Her chest had been doing that weird thing where it felt like she couldn't breathe even though she was, obviously, breathing; and she spent way too long making her suitcase, thinking about what to wear when she usually just threw on whatever was closest to her. 

She’d been acting unlike herself, since declaring herself game for the little adventure, and that scared her. She understood the implications and yet… no.

She was not willing to admit to it, yet. 

On one hand, she knew that she was going as a friend, as moral support and to help Gino with whatever was going to happen between him and this woman. But still, her mind played out a couple of treacherous scenarios in which Iseo simply wasn't there and they spend their time laughing and having fun and nothing else. 

For his part, Gino, spent half the week smiling and joking and as energetic as usual and the other half silent, contemplative, nervous and just… _off_. Anya came to visit on Tuesday and they'd spent the entire day on the roof, talking away from all prying ears, though not from prying eyes. 

Gino would stare at Kallen during council meetings or during classes with a guarded, searching look, but when she turned to look back at him, and ask what was wrong he’d smile at her and shake it off. 

And after the planing stage and buying the tickets, they hadn’t talked much about the trip, which somehow made Kallen feel more apprehensive about it all. 

Wednesday night, Kallen couldn't sleep at all, thinking only, _mortifyingly_ , of the former Knight of 3. 

She reminded herself more than one that the trip wasn’t weird at all, she was simply a good friend helping another friend out. 

That’s it.

But as the night went on and on and _on and on_ and she continued to be awake… she would remember specific moments they’ve shared in the time they’d known each other. 

She remembered meeting him in China, though he had barely registered on her radar at the time… she remembered talking to him when she was a prisoner of Schniezel through a glass wall.

He’d been surprisingly intent on knowing her reasons for renouncing her status as a Britannian. And his loyalty to Suzaku had moved her even then. 

She remembered that last fight against Suzaku, how Gino had not only accepted her to be the better pilot and the Gurren to be a better machine, and yet had stayed and provided invaluable and much needed support, after. 

That reminded her of waking up on a beach to the smoldering remains of the Gurren MK II and Tristan, waiting to be arrested and thinking, _well, at least I'm not alone._

She remembered coming back to Ashford for the first time and his delight at being a normal student for once (or as close as they would ever be, considering their status as international celebrities), the funny powder blue suit he wore for Ohgi and Villetta's wedding…

So many moments, and groaning, Kallen turned once more into her bed and tried to sleep.

In the morning she shouldered her bag and said goodbye to her mother before going to school. She dumped her travel bag in the clubhouse, and then went through her classes a bundle of tightly wrapped energy. 

Gino arrived at lunch, sheepishly telling her he’d spent the morning making his bag; he had been too lazy to do it the night before. Kallen rolled her eyes and smacked the back of his head lightly, but smiled back at him when he laughed at his own foolishness, relieved by his lightheartedness. 

They left the school at around 4, and headed straight to the train station, talking animatedly about… nothing in particular.

Once on the train, they spent the first couple of hours entertaining kids who recognized them as the legendary Kouzuki Kallen (the Ace) and Gino Weinberg, who had recently been promoted by Nunnally to the rank of Knight of 1- 

_(That had been a surprise. When Nunnally had reinstated the Knights as guards to the royal family, Gino had later confessed to Kallen that he thought the rank would surely go to Cornelia, not only because of the older woman’s expertise as a Knightmare Frame Pilot, but also because they were siblings, and Nunnally and Gino had not had more than a few cordial conversations since they had known each other._

_((Zero, despite being Nunnally’s personal protector, could not swear allegiance to any country, least of all Britannia, in this time of tentative peace.))_

_But when he had asked the young empress for her reasons, they had been sound and wise. Cornelia was her only remaining sister, and Nunnally knew that if the older woman was to serve as her protector, they’d never be able to confide in each other the same way. Cornelia would forever be too preoccupied with her sister and monarch’s safety._

_And second, Nunnally had said, with surprisingly strong conviction and kind but intelligent eyes - Gino had, unlike most Britannians, had to decide at one point, weather to serve Lelouch and the empire he was born into unconditionally, or to do what he felt was right. And he’d chosen liberty, which made Nunnally sure he had a good heart, which she valued above all else._

_The fact that he was also one of the best Knightmare Pilots in the world was probably besides the point by then.)_

The children on the train looked up to them with absolute hero worship, and were at first entertained with stories of Knighmare battles, but somehow those stories turned into embarrassing anecdotes about each other, and before long the kids were protesting and crying as their mothers took them away, apologizing for the inconvenience. Not before the mothers themselves asked for a picture or an autograph. Blushing about the attention, Gino and Kallen agreed. 

Being a celebrity was odd to them both, but they had each other to rely on and share the experience, so it was not as bad as it could be. They talked, ate the sandwiches Kallen’s mother had prepared, and eventually drift off to sleep. 

Kallen woke up about an hour before reaching their destination and realized she’d been leaning quite heavily on Gino, her head on his chest and both her legs tucked under one of his. She thought about jumping up and apologizing, but realized he was still peacefully asleep, head leaning on the glass window. 

Blushing, she stayed that way a while longer, happy for the warmth, _(it had gotten quite cold as the night rolled in, and her brain helpfully informed her that human bodies gave out warmth when close to one another)_ but before long she straightened out and composed herself. Gino woke up not too long afterwards, and tired but awake they waited in companionable silence until the train stopped at the main Sendai station.

They took a taxi instead of waiting for the next train to the hotel, and each headed into their singular rooms, side by side. 

Completely exhausted, Kallen threw herself onto the bed. She looked at the room from her comfortable position, face up towards the ceiling and arms and legs splayed wide. The walls were cream colored, the dresser, desk and ornaments all lacquered wood. There was a TV and a minibar, a balcony and a bathroom, and a nice rice paper pattern frame above her bed. The floor was wood as well, and the bed sheets a nice white and red leaf pattern.

_Hey, Kallen?_ She heard through the wall behind her bed, muffled but understandable. 

Unconsciously, she smiled at Gino’s voice.

“Yeah?”

_Thanks again, for coming with me._

“Anytime Gino,” she said, “What are friends for right?”

His answer came after a lengthy pause.

_…yeah. Good night Gurren._

“‘Night Gino.”

She slept deeply and dreamlessly all night.


	3. Chapter 3

Gino was way too nervous to go and see Iseo directly, so Kallen suggested they spend the day sightseeing instead, and he rapidly agreed.

They both turned their phones off and headed to a fancy Onsen, but got bored pretty quickly being separated and all alone, attended by 3 different people and given about 10 towels, and so decided to go to a public mixed bath instead, wearing their Ashford Academy bathing suits, and plaiying a ridiculous game of rapidly entering and exiting different levels of hot and cold springs, shrieking in joy and splashing each other before being nicely, but nervously, thrown out.

_(The poor man in charge of approaching two of the most famous, powerful and world renowned Knightmare pilots, known for their incredible feats in battle and destruction… and telling them to leave was a hunched, shaking, pale man who stuttered the orders his higher ups had given him in between many, maaany apologies. Out of pity for the unfortunate employee they only scared him a little before leaving, grinning and giggling.)_

They ate gyūtan, and Gino loved it and Kallen didn't, but finished her plate anyways. Then they went icecream hunting, and thanks to a boy around 9 years old with a strawberry cone in his hand, discovered the best cones either of them have ever had. Kallen got vanilla first, then a second helping of chocolate, and Gino went straight for the chocolate for both rounds. They couldn't really move after stuffing themselves so fully, and so wandered until they found a bench, where they sat until they felt less bloated. 

Finally, they took a walk through the Jozenji-Dori street after getting embarrassingly lost on the subway, going in completely the wrong direction twice before finally arriving. When they got back to the hotel in the evening they ate and talked animatedly about the day at the hotel’s restaurant, 

_(where no less than 4 people approached them for pictures and autographs)._

After dinner they went up to Gino's room to watch TV until very late, neither wanting the day to be over yet. Kallen fell asleep, and was less than half conscious when Gino picked her up like a child and took her to her own room. He said something into her ear, but she was so gone into dreams that she didn't really hear it.

In the morning when she woke up, her mother, Ohgi, Tamaki and Rivalz had all left her about 50 messages, and she had to call them all back and apologize for worrying them. 

After taking a bath and changing into a simple red shirt and some rather short shorts (Gino’s always said he likes red, but, she thinks furiously, she’s not wearing it for that reason… she likes red too, and it looks _good_ on her.) 

She goes to knock on Gino’s door, and he opens it almost immediately. Kallen notices right away that he recently got out of his own bath, his hair still slightly damp and the simple, white T-shirt he was wearing sticking to his skin. 

He stared at her when he opened the door like he did sometimes; with his sky blue eyes hiding a storm of emotions. She ducked under him and headed straight into the room. She stood, balancing on her toes and talon while he grabbed his room key, wallet and jacket, before turning to her and telling her he was ready to go looking for Iseo. 

Kallen felt like a stone has dropped into her stomach. But she nodded.

They ate breakfast quietly, and left without saying anything much to each other, the complete opposite of the previous day.

Once they arrived, Gino stared at Iseo’s door for a long time before Kallen had to knock for him. 

He looked down at her with wide, hesitant eyes and she smiled encouragingly at him. Gino took in a couple of quick breaths, then exhaled slowly and smoothed out his hair. Kallen bumped his arm in a show of support and they both stared at the door in trepidation as they heard a woman’s voice yell out, “Coming!” and then quiet steps coming towards them.

Kallen wasn't exactly sure what to expect from Iseo. She had imagined a woman that looked like Sayoko, for some reason, and when the door opened she was completely disappointed.

Iseo was tall, not as tall as Gino, but a lot taller than Kallen, with white skin and ruby red lips. Her brown, slanted eyes were outlined by a pale shade of makeup that made them look even more beautiful. Her long hair was dyed, dark roots peeking out of her light brown hair and reaching down bellow her tiny waist. Her body was perfectly proportioned, and she reminded Kallen of Villetta’s model-like figure, more than anyone else she knew. And she had a beautifully intricate dragon tattoo on her arm, revealed by the green tank top she was wearing over a loose skirt.

Iseo, for her part, seemed frozen in shock. She took in Gino, looking at him up and down with a small frown on her face, and by the way her mouth moved it was obvious that she was trying to say something, but couldn’t quite find the words. She looked at Kallen briefly, still wide eyed and baffled before her gaze went up to Gino’s face again.

Kallen looked at him too. He looked apprehensive about being under Iseo’s gaze, but there was obvious care in his gaze as well.

Kallen’s chest did the annoying clenching. Her stomach felt empty, her skin prickled as she looked at him, and he looked at Iseo.

Iseo finally found her voice “…Gino, oh my… how did you find me?”

Stammering a bit, looking a bit panicked and lost, Gino said “A friend… a friend helped me.”

Iseo’s eyes darted towards Kallen again and then she seemed to mentally steel herself. She smiled hesitantly at them both and opened her door wide. 

“Come on in, then.” 

Gino seemed unsure, so Kallen pushed him forward, and soon the three of them were sitting in a modest living room, toys strewn around and everything looking a little worn. There were pictures all around the house, mostly of Iseo herself and her daughter, a toddler who came into the room to play after hearing the visitors. 

“Her name’s Rei” Iseo told them, “I named her after Zero.” 

At first, the conversation was stilted, polite and meaningless. 

They spoke of the weather, Rei, how cute she was, the food they’d tried while in the city… and then Iseo started talking to Kallen directly and the conversation abruptly turned serious. 

“It really is an honor to meet you in person Kouzuki-san. As one of the founding members of the black knights… I must tell you how much that first rebellion with Zero meant to me, personally… It was a difficult life as an 11, and at the time… at the time I was struggling to find a purpose to my life… so many contributed to the world as it is today, but I wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for Zero and you original Black Knights.”

And after Kallen stammered out a hesitant, awkward your’e welcome, the type she had never become accustomed to, even after countless people in the street had expressed similar sentiments to those that Iseo was professing right now, Kallen asked, and Iseo told them her life story. 

“I was orphaned in the original Britannian invasion, and after struggling to find food and shelter, entered a program for young “beautiful” numbers… it wasn’t only 11s, girls from 1, 7, 8… I met many girls similar to myself. We were there to become maids and provide any other services for Britannian nobles and families. I was employed for less than a year in Area 11 before being transported to the Britannian mainland.” 

“There, I spent a couple of years assisting an elderly woman until she died of old age, and then I was transferred into the Weinberg family. The system didn’t pay much, but there were always lodgings and meals and the other servants became my friends as well. My life during that time was better than it had been previously in Area 11, so I tried to enjoy myself as much as I could, while I could."

“But after being caught with Gino… I was deported from the mainland, flown back to area 11 immediately and unable to work legally anymore. I had to move to the ghetto and lived as a beggar for a while. At that time I contemplated taking my own life, thinking I’d never amount to anything… and that was when Zero first appeared. He filled me with hope for the future. So I joined the underground rebellion, and was one of the million people who migrated to China with the second founding of the Special Administrative Zone of Japan. I met and fell in love with a Chinese soldier during that time. I became pregnant of his child, but he died in the war against the Demon Emperor. My tattoo is meant to commemorate him… his name meant dragon, he told me, in his native tongue. I moved back to Japan only recently, thanks to the diverse programs the government is implementing to reinstate Japanese culture after the war.”

Then she ended her story by taking a deep breath and looking straight at Gino, saying: “To be frank, I’ve hated and blamed Britannians in general, and you in particular for most of my life… but after Rei was born, and in this new world of peace, I am trying to let the past be the past … for my daughter, and for the future."

It was quiet for a time. 

Then Gino bowed low to Iseo, on his knees, the Japanese way… and told her he had come to see that she was doing well and offer anything he had at his disposition - money or a recommendation for work or whatever she might need in the future for herself and for her daughter - and his most sincere apologies for the role he had played in her struggles. 

Iseo seemed taken aback by the gesture. She inclined her head towards him, and said: “I’ll think about it… To be honest, this visit was unexpected and has unsettled me quite a bit… if you two wouldn’t mind, I’d like to go lay down now.”

She took down Gino’s number and then accompanied them to the door. 

They were somber, as they left. 

Kallen’s mind was filled with Iseo’s story. Every mention of Lelouch- of Zero, really, had pained her. 

Few knew the truth of who Zero had been… of who Zero now was. And it confused her to see her own emotions towards the man, before she’d known who he was, reflected in someone else’s story. 

Lelouch had been many things, and Kallen had loved him for a time because, and _despite_ , that.

Sometimes, even now, she still berated herself for not believing in Lelouch. For not standing with him, and with Suzaku. 

She’d betrayed him twice, no, three times… and perhaps that was why he had not trusted her, at the end. 

And now, walking besides the tall and silent man besides her… now she finally had to admit that some of those feelings she had for Lelouch she now had towards Gino. 

It was an uncomfortable realization, considering exactly _why_ and _where_ they were at the moment.

At school, and even amongst the Black Knights, she was constantly teased about Gino’s supposed infatuation with her… Yet despite his constant flirting, she was never sure, really, how much of it was an act and how much was… possibly… real. 

She suddenly had the urge to _know_. 

And she knew his answer might scare her. Or hurt her. (or _both_ )

They wandered for a while, not speaking, each in their own world before realizing it was time to eat and entering a restaurant. 

As they waited for their food, Kallen began a tentative conversation. 

“She…Iseo. She wasn’t what I was expecting at all.”

Gino looked at her. His face had been carefully blank and serious since they’ve arrived. It was a look he always carried when he was acting as a soldier. Serious, direct. Hiding any true emotions from the world, and leaving behind the mask of goofiness and levity he usually employed. 

He rarely showed her this side of him. 

But today has been intense. For all of them, it seemed. 

“She’s changed.” He said. 

They were quiet for a time. Kallen fiddled with her phone. She felt like texting someone… but couldn’t decide who. And what to say. With a pang, stronger than she’d felt in quite some time, she thought about her brother. 

The food arrived, and just as Kallen was about to take her first bite, Gino spoke again. 

“I thought seeing her would be… I don’t know. Cathartic, maybe. Closure. But I didn't get that. I’m not even sure what I feel. Shame? At having caused her so many problems? Relief? that she’s okay now? I haven’t felt so conflicted since I decided to ally myself with the EU after the Rounds failed to defeat Suzaku.”

His face had changed somewhat. A crack in the facade. He seemed tired. Sad. 

“Do you love her?” asked Kallen. She felt shocked to have said it. Almost as if the question slipped out. 

Then he was looking at her, straight at her, and Kallen thought she might forget how to breathe. 

“I feel something for her. I’m not sure what, yet. But I’m not in love with her anymore. I’m… It’s different, now.”

He lowered his eyes, and they ate.

Kallen felt strange. Heavy with feelings, and yet unable to express them. They went towards the train station, then when it began to rain, bought an umbrella and decided to walk back instead. 

They avoided the people and the fans that they have been encountering constantly, with the hoods of their sweaters up and huddled close together under the umbrella, they were difficult to recognize. 

When they reached the door of the hotel, Gino’s phone rang. An unknown number. 

He answered, and on the other end, a garbled voice said something. Gino’s face immediately went blank once more. 

“Iseo” He said. 

Kallen suddenly felt like crying. 

She looked out at the raining street, trying to ignore the sound of the distorted voice coming from Gino’s phone. He responded with one sentence answers. 

“Sure.”, “I understand”, “Don’t worry.”, “Of course”… and then, 

“I’ll call a cab right now. I’ll be over in half an hour.” 

Kallen didn’t look at him when he hanged up. They were quiet a moment, and then she said, 

“Do you wan’t me to come?”

She could feel him shake his head, even without turning to look at him, close as they were, under the umbrella. Still, he responded verbally. 

“No, it’s all right. I think I should go alone.” 

And then, 

“Kallen.” 

She looked up to him. His expression closed off once again. But his eyes… his eyes tried to tell her something she simply couldn't understand. 

In that moment, he reminds her of Lelouch. 

“Don’t wait up. I’ll call if anything comes up.”

A cab passed by, and he hailed it. He gave her the umbrella, and in seconds was gone. 

Kallen turned and went up to her room. 


	4. Chapter 4

After Gino headed out, Kallen spent half an hour debating with herself, wondering if she should follow him or not. Guiltily, she decided not to. This was, after all, his story and his journey… and she’d come only as his moral support. As a _friend_. 

And he asked her not to go. 

So she watched TV, went downstairs to the lobby to do some homework on a computer. 

Her chat box jumped up and she talked with Milly, then with Tamaki. She texted Nunally even, who was usually so occupied being the sovereign of New Britannia that they never could just speak anymore… but her head remained a jumbled mess. 

She returned to her room and ordered her food via room service, unable, for today, to smile and give out autographs at the restaurant.

She laid down on her bed and tried to sleep, but as soon as she closed her eyes a startlingly clear image jumped into her mind of Gino kissing Iseo. It was illogical and improbable, and her eyes snapped open in an attempt to banish the image, but it just kept unraveling, even with her eyes open. 

She could see Gino kissing Iseo, her hands tangled in his hair, his hands on her hips, then moving to grab her legs… she saw Iseo gasp, arch her back into him and close her eyes as he dips his head to kiss her neck- saw her hook a leg around his hip and bring him closer. 

“Gino” said Iseo- but Kallen realized it was actually her voice. 

She’d said that out loud. 

Blushing, she went to take a freezing cold shower, because she’s heard that helped, and the water distracted her for half a minute before she was unconsciously cupping one of her breasts and imagining Gino once more. 

Then she screamed, because _no_ , this was _not happening to her again_ , she didn't want to think about this. She dressed quickly, and still damp, went outside for a run. 

It was still raining outside, though it had lessened into a drizzle, and there were not many people around. She pushed herself to go fast, -as fast and as hard as she could. She ran through the town and then through the woods behind the hotel they’d been staying at and only stopped an hour later when she broke through the trees and came upon a road. 

She hailed a passing car and climbed in. 

It had stopped raining. 

“Oh my!” said the driver, “Aren’t you Kouzuki Kallen? I saw you on the paper today! It said you’d been sighted in Sendai but I didn’t believe it!”

Kallen smiled tiredly. “Yes, I guess I am”.

“Is it true that the Knight of 1 is here as well?" asked the driver excitedly and Kallen felt tears prickling in her eyes unexpectedly. 

“Yeah,” she said, “He’s here too.” 

The man took her all the way to the hotel, even though she told him more than once that the main road was close enough, and he declined when she offered to pay him, but asked, if only he could get an autograph? please? His name was Shouto, and Kallen smiled tightly as she signed the notebook he handed her with a _thank you for the ride._

Shivering, she headed up to her room, knocking on Gino’s door, to check if he was back, but of course he wasn’t, and completely exhausted fell on her bed, shoes still on, and fell asleep. 

She woke to the darkness outside, and to her phone ringing. 

Groggily, she picked up. 

“mmmyellow?”

“Kallen?” said Gino on the other end, and she sat up straight on her bed. There was something off about his voice…

“Gino! where are you? are you alright?” she asked, with probably more distress in her voice than was warranted. Gino snorted on the other end of the phone. 

“No, not alrigh- alreih… not ok. Pretty drunk, actually. Can you come get me? I can’t remember the name of the place we’re stayin.”

“Of course” she said, ”Where are you?”

He told her.

She hanged up and looked outside - it was raining again. She put on a jacket, not the still humid hoodie from the afternoon, took her wallet, phone, the key to her room and the umbrella they’d bought in the afternoon before heading out. 

It was pretty late. 

She called a taxi from the front desk at the hotel, and the drowsy looking attendant looked at her as if she was crazy. In less than 20 minutes she was at the the corner he’d told her he was at. 

He was sitting on the curb, the bar he’d been at apparently closed already. He was leaning on an electric pole, shivering, looking miserable. 

“You idiot.” She scolded as she half pushed, half dragged him into the cab. 

“What happened?” She sat besides him instead of up front and he slouched so that his head was leaning on her shoulder. He was cold, and his lips were touching her skin as he mumbles out, “She hates me. hell thea knows its shut m’family but still shthinks I ruined her life… She’s right, too.”

Kallen shushed him, half understanding his words. She hugged him, both for comfort and warmth, as he continued to shiver fiercely. 

Getting him up to his room was incredibly challenging, considering he was almost double her height and weight, and she cursed furiously when he sleepily told her he’d lost his keys. She stuck him in her room, taking of his shoes and socks, his jacket and his shirt and covering him in towels and blankets while she debated the merits of going down to the front desk and the almost asleep attendant and asking for a new room key. 

Sitting him on the edge of her bed, she dried his hair with a towel (it had come loose from his usual braids and was getting him wet _again_ after she’s already dried his shoulders). And she’d been standing in front of him, thinking about how unfair it was that even sitting down he looked tall and trying not to think about how blond his hair was or how very toned his stomach and arms and back were, when his hands came up and covered hers, stopping her motions.

She blinked and focused on him, and found his cerulean eyes staring straight back at her. 

“If you have to punch me, I really don’t care anymore” he mumbled, and she frowned. 

“Why would I punch you? going out and getting drunk was irresponsible and stupid but-“ his hands left hers and ensnared her waist, pulling her towards him, and down so that she was sitting on his leg, then leant into her and kissed her. 

Kallen’s mind blanked out for a second as she stared cross eyed at his closed eyelids and still damp hair, then her body reacted and she closed her own eyes and opened her mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck. 

It didn't start out slow at all. They kissed passionately, deeply. When she opened her eyes and came up for air she gasped out a “wait-no… you’re thinking about Iseo aren’t you? I shouldn’t...” 

Gino kissed her again. “I’m not.” He murmured against her lips, then sticked his tongue inside her mouth and she moaned involuntarily. 

“I’ve been thinking-about-you- _only_ you…since we got here.” His words were short and cut off by their continued kissing, and then he twisted her around and laid her down on the bed. 

He half laid half leaned on top of her, and she opened her eyes again to stare into his blue, _so blue_ \- eyes and protested again (though even as she did a voice in her head said that if he stopped kissing her she was going to be very disappointed indeed.) 

“Wait - you’re drunk you don’t really want to-“ he interrupted her again. 

“I am drunk”, though he sounded a thousand times more sober than he did not even 10? minutes ago, 

"I do want to. Very, very much.” Kallen surrendered to his mouth, to her body and to her need and went with it. 

She wanted this. She wanted him to want her. She _wanted_ , for once, in this matter, _not_ to think, just feel. 

Gino had one hand to her waist, the other roaming everywhere. He cupped her face, feeling down her chest and stomach. He grabbed her leg, then went back up- under her shirt, back up her stomach until he was up to her breast… and then he squeezed. Kallen groaned again, her own hands trying to hold on to him - his back, his arms his stomach his hips. 

They rolled over, and then suddenly it was just too much for her- and she was pushing him away, saying “Wait-Wait Stop!” 

At first he didn't even seem to hear her, but she took both of his hands into hers and in front of her, and then she looked at him again, and said quietly, “Gino! Stop”. 

His eyes, glazed by alcohol and lust foccused gradually, and when the message finally seemed to find him, he rolled of her and lays on his back, staring at the ceiling. 

“Sorry” he muttered, not looking at her at all.

They breathed in silence for a moment, calming down and then Kallen, still in a mindset of impulsivity and not overthinking things - creeped up to him, carefully laid her hand on his chest, wanting the contact but aware that as hypersensitive as they both were to each other right at the moment, too much contact would be detrimental to her mission. 

She said, “It’s not that I don’t want to…just-this is too fast. Not like this. This night… I mean, an hour ago you were literally, in the gutter thinking about your ex."

Then he looks at her, and smiled, his brilliant, amazing smile, and pushed off the bed a little, grabbing her chin with one hand and kissing her forehead softly, then hugging her bare shoulders. 

She blushed brilliantly, more aware of the small kiss than she had been while making out. 

“You’re right. I’m sorry for pushing” he said. 

They laid there for a time, awake but silent, hugging, and eventually she asks, no longer feeling any guilt or mixed emotions, 

“What happened?"

He told her, and after crying, probably, and drinking, and wallowing in self-pity, he sounded much more like himself than he had that afternoon at lunch. 

Iseo had wanted to tell him that she did blame him, even though she was trying, really hard, not to. She was aware that he was not solely to blame for everything that had led up to her deportation from Britannia… but to let go, she needed to tell him everything that she hd thought. And he had let her, because she was right… and in a way, it had been good to hear all the things he secretly believed in said out loud. 

And then they continued talking. Kallen told him about how Iseo’s story had hit so hard. How Zero had shaped her life, for so long… and now that he was gone, or rather, _changed…_ she felt so unmoored. Everything had changed, and she felt alien, almost. 

Being in school was a way for her to hide, to postpone her re-introduction to the Black Nights, to confront her new position in the world. And it scared her. Terrified her even. 

And then she admitted, quietly, 

“Also… I’m… not actually sure what I feel about you. I like you but…”

He hugged her tighter for a second, then loosened his grip a little. 

“Thats fine. You need to take things slow, figure things out. As long as you don’t run away, I won’t push, and we can find out.”

She smiled. 

"I… I’d like that. for you not to push… for you to let me figure things out at my own pace.”

They talked until the sun came up, though considering the late time they’d arrived it wasn’t like it was the entire the night, and then they fell asleep, wrapped up in each other for a couple of hours until the front desk called asking if they were going to sign out of pay for an extra day, because if they were signing out they only had half an hour to do so. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol so I changed the verb tense of the entire story. Present wasn't working for me.... so if you see any weird verbs I missed, sorry.


	5. Chapter 5

Breakfast also counted as lunch, and they took it in the hotel buffet, though they did manage to sign out before having to pay for an extra day. 

Breakfast was, surprisingly, not awkward. 

Even after Iseo called again, asking to meet up. This time, Kallen decided, she was going because she was going. The uncertainty killed her. 

They left their bags at the train station lockers after eating, and then walked to the park where Iseo had said she would be. 

Kallen wondered what else the woman could want, but once more, Iseo surprised her. 

She was wearing a loose black dress, and a sunhat, and when she saw them approach she smiled, and waved. 

After a couple of hesitant hellos, on the side of the Knightmare pilots, all three of them sat on a bench, overlooking a sand pit where Rei and two other small children played. 

As they say, Iseo turned to Gino, specifically, and said, 

"I’m sorry for yesterday. I’m glad you came, and I think it was good for me too let go… but It came from a place of anger, and I don’t want to be that person anymore…” 

She turned her body more towards him, and looked into his eyes. 

"I do forgive you", she says to Gino, “I wanted you to know that before you left. And… you look so different now. You act so different. I think it’s difficult to realize sometimes that everyone’s paths are different, and you can’t, or you shouldn’t, judge anyone for theirs” 

She glanced at Kallen then, for a second, smiling once again, and Kallen was struck by how beautiful she was once more. 

"So… maybe on some days I am angry, at the circumstances that happened in my life. But they passed, and the people and the government that led to that life are gone. It would be wrong of me to hold on. So. You are forgiven.”

They where quiet then, listening to the children shriek and play. It was a beautiful day.

"I don’t know what to say". said Gino, after a moment. 

He no longer looked pained, or anxious. 

Iseo laughed, then. 

"Well, I’m not all together altruistic. You are a very important person, and if you meant what you said… of helping us out, if we need it… I’m not saying no to that.”

Gino looked affronted. 

"Of course I meant it!" 

“Good." She said, “And you, Kouzuki-san, just… once more, it was an honor to meet you.” 

Kallen blushed deeply, and replied, 

“You as well, Iseo-san. You… meeting you has helped me, on my own path to letting go of the past. So thank you as well.”

They stayed at the park until it was time to leave, playing with the children, talking animatedly about everything and anything. Gino’s easy grin came back at some point, and Iseo showed off a side of vicious sarcasm that has Kallen laughing out loud at moments. 

Every now and then Kallen catched Gino’s eye, and his grin widened, and her stomatch leapt, and she let it. 

They waved off Iseo and Rei, then walked to the station and recovered their bags. It wasn’t long after they climbed into the train that it began to move, and they watched as the city of Sendai got smaller and smaller until they were traveling through hills and sceneries free of human settlements. Kallen got the window, for the way back, and she stared out of it as they travelled.

“Kallen,” said Gino, and she startled and looked up at him. 

“You know everything will be fine right?” he asked her. 

And it took her a second, but then she smiled, nodding. 

They sat side by side, touching shoulders but not much else. Gino’s arms were hanging in his lap, and impulsively she decided to take his hand. 

He curled his fingers into hers, but didin’t make any other moves, or say anything for that matter, and more than anything that tamed the blush that burned on her face. 

The sky was illuminated in beautiful tones of soft pinks and pale oranges. 

She could feel herself as if from some part deep inside, looking out at the future, and the rest of her life. 

School was ending, and her career awaited. It didn't seem so daunting, anymore. She turned away from the window and leaned against Gino’s shoulder. Their hands, clasped together, lay between them. 

She closed her eyes.

Everything would be fine. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should point out that I wrote this story a couple of years ago when I was trying to work through a crush I had on a friend. I’d only written I think a few snippets of the beginning of the story and the making out scene… and I stumbled upon it while looking for something else and the concept wasn’t terrible… so I finished it. 
> 
> I’m no longer very into writing romance, and I admit I got a little bored by the end and that's why it ends so suddenly... but the Gino/Kallen tag is so poor I felt I might as well add to it.

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer.  
> The full quote is: "Everything is illuminated in the light of the past. It is always along the side of us, on the inside, looking out."  
> Which in this story I take to mean that all experiences are in some way influenced by our past experiences, who we where before... and that you can learn from the past and acknowledge how it's changed you. 
> 
> This story is loosely based on the backstory given to Gino in the Rounds Light Novel. 
> 
> Iseo is named that way because of Tristan. The Legend of Tristan and Iseult. A Japanese-ish name similar to Iseult. 
> 
> As a last note; I tend to confuse tenses sometimes, especially considering this is (mostly), in present tense... so please bear with me any mistakes :) 
> 
> This is me indulging in one of my rare pairs that doesn't get much love.


End file.
